My Testimony

I comitted myself to the LORD the Sunday before Easter in 1993 in an Assembly of God church. I put my faith and trust in Jesus Christ, Yeshua the Messiah. I accepted the free gift of forgiveness that He offered to me because He already paid for my sins with His own blood, He was the atonement for my sins. I agreed to keep Him as the leader of my life – in every way. Within a few short years I was studying my Bible, on my own, daily. I was filling my heart and mind with mostly Christian music and Bible teachers. I was a dry sponge and just couldn’t get enough. By the time my son was born, almost 3 years later, I had decided to read the Bible through, one chapter a day. I had always had an interest in ancient history, and my Bible study only fueled it more. I immersed myself in my chapter-by-chapter Bible reading for years, it took quite a while. For a time I was a single mom with very limited income. I had to learn to depend on God and trust Him as my Provider and Protector. He never failed me, in fact, we always had more than enough. As time went on and I was no longer a single mom but now a wife with step-children, I was presented with a whole new set of challenges and opportunities to grow from. I had to learn to keep pursuing Him when I didn’t feel like it, when life felt too heavy for me to bear, when I felt He had abandoned and forgotten me, and when life was too distracting. I had to learn to choose to stand on His faithfulness and His truth, I had to find my faith and see if it was true or not. There were some very tough times and some hurtful times since I had given my life to the LORD. But He has never failed me, never left me, and always worked things out for the best – even when I just couldn’t fathom how a situation could be worked out for the best.

My journey took on a different pace when we started homeschooling. In the summer of 2002 I felt a strong leading to homeschool the kids. It was not a new idea to me, but the strength the leading this time could not be ignored. In the past when I felt this gentle leading I had made deals with the LORD and to His credit, He had kept His end of every bargain I had made for Him, He is faithful. I had worked closely with the school and was very involved in many areas of the school the kids attended. But He was calling us to something different and I needed to listen and obey Him fully this time, no more compromises. DH agreed, so we began our adventure in homeschooling. Part of our main concern was to teach the children Scripture and not just memorizing parts of it, but gaining an understanding of G*d’s Word as a whole. For many years I have had an incredible passion for the Old Testament and the history of the times. So I purchased a chronological Bible study that came highly recommended to me by a friend. This study took us through small bits and pieces that we could discuss and understand in an order that made the whole story come alive. We used this as a basis for our studying history, social studies, geography, and anything else we could wrap into it. During this time the Lord brought much into our home that coincided specifically with what we were reading. For example, we read about Abraham’s two sons, Ishmael and Isaac. We talked about who the Arab people are, how a great many of them are Muslims today, and how that related to the war in Iraq and the terrorism on September 11. So we did a short study on what Islam is in order to better understand. While we were reading through the Exodus and working through Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy, (all at the same times, as it is a chronological study) we came upon the verse in Deuteronomy that speaks of not cutting your head in mourning for a loved one. It may seem an odd verse, but to illustrate that was the National Geographic article that had come just days before. In that article there were pictures of Muslims cutting their heads in mourning of Mohammad’s death centuries ago. The impression that left on the kids and myself was deep. These struggles not only continue today, but G*d’s Word speaks even out of obscure verses to us today. He brought events and specific items into our lives as we studied His Word, all to illustrate His points and to bring us to a point where we were much more aware of Him now than we were before. For the three of us at home during the day, the book of Leviticus was the most exciting reading we had ever done together because of what the LORD was doing in our hearts and in our lives.

A while after the kids and I began this study, DH wanted to participate as well so we started over from the beginning as a family. How exciting this was! To study and learn together as a family the way G*d intended from the very beginning, it has been wonderful for all of us. When we read, as a family this time, about Mt. Sinai where G*d litterally rolls back the heavens and comes down to sit on a mountain top with Moses and announces to His people, “Hi. I’m G*d, the Creator of the Universe. I chose Abraham and his decendants through Isaac and Jacob to be my people, precious in My sight, the apple of My eye. You are My people and I love you very much. Now, here is what I intended for all creation from the beginning. I am revelaing it only to you. You are the keepers of My laws and decrees. You are to be a people different from the rest, separate and dedicated only to Me. Through you all the peoples of the earth will come to know me. This is a covenant between you and Me, a marriage contract.” To this the people replied, “We will obey!” Reading where the LORD reveals His heart to His chosen people has been incredible, it left impressions on each of us that will never be forgotten. And the realization that through faith in Messiah Yeshua we are grafted into the lineage of Abraham, we are adopted into the family. It has glued our family together at a very deep level. It has affected everything we do.

We began to get a clearer understanding of the Word as we studied the historical context and social context of what we were reading, for example what was life like at the time of the Exodus and Judges? This began our journey in learning about our Hebrew Roots as Believers in Yeshua. It was as if scales were falling from our eyes and stuffing removed from our ears. My understanding of familiar old verses was new and alive in a whole new way. We began to re-evaluate our own theologies and understandings of Scripture and how we applied it to our lives.

We have always had the desire to take Scripture seriously and to take G*d at His word. When He says “forever” He means forever. When He says not to do something, He means it. We read about the feasts that G*d appointed for His people and we discussed why He set them up. We began to study the feasts and their symbolism, the deep roots they give to the people, and their Messianic fulfillment s. This has been an incredible adventure in our family!! We began to celebrate, as best as we can, out of obedience to G*d’s Word because He never changes and He did say He intended them to be kept by His children forever, native born and foreigner alike. The more we learn and apply to our lives, the deeper our desire to follow Him goes. Some have called our venture ‘legalism’ but it is far from legalism. Others have used less kind words. Our concerns are from our hearts, our desire to know Him more and be obedient to His commands. We want to obey out of honor and respect for our Master. We fully realize that we do not earn favor with Him through our actions nor do we become “better Christians” than anyone else. We simply want to obey His Word. We want to be brides that He will be proud of and children of the King who wear His Name in such a way that it brings joy to the Father. We feel this is the direction in which we’re been led – so we follow. And honestly, it has been tremendously fulfilling and inspiring.

Our walk as a family, and my personal walk with Him, have grown so much over these few years. I have done my best to study and understand Scripture and to apply it to my life. A challenge I put out to the family recently has been to “Work out your salvation with fear and trembling”. We have been taking this very seriously. I have been trying to keep the ways He set out for His children so long ago. It is clear to me that I don’t always need to know why before I obey, often times I will never know why. The “why” isn’t the issue, simple obedience is the issue. When He says that certain things aren’t suitable for food, I choose to obey. When He says to rest on the seventh day, I choose to obey. To some it may sound as if this is a heavy burden, and truly this is often taught in Christian circles. But my experience has been anything but burdensome! Yeshua said His burden is light – and it truly is! I choose to obey out of love and worship because to obey is better than sacrifice. It is a joy for me to do these things, a pleasure and a privelage. Taking His Word with utmost seriousness has changed my life in ways I never thought it would, I simply can’t say enough about it.

This is a process that I am still in the beginning stages of, a journey that I have only just begun. I know that there are many lessons to be learned farther on down the road. I am excited to get there, so I can know more about my LORD. My desire is to please Him and Him alone. Here on earth, the only other person I am concerned with pleasing is my husband. Outside of that I am painfully aware that there will be many who will not understand the direction I am choosing to take, the path I am being led down. The feeling of being all alone, outside of my own family, is sometimes a difficult one. Having friends who just simply don’t understand is often difficult. But that is okay. I must follow and be obedient. It is often said that “G*d is doing a new thing” but I believe He is doing an old thing – bringing His people back to Him as He told Moses and said through the prophets would happen. It’s time to find and follow His ancient path, the road may be difficult and the gate is narrow, but the reward at the end is unspeakable!